Conspiracy Theory...

“Left leg kick! One, two and three. Now right leg step back, one….”

As you can see, I’ve taken to a much healthier living. NOT… Okay, so I am trying afterall; come on, you’ve got to give me some credit for trying at least. Bugger, I’ve put on more weight than I lost in secondary school. It’s a conspiracy, I tell you. Bunch of scheming economists *shakes fist in the air*! I know what you’re trying to do. You make us work our arses off, only to make us turn to the comfort of food. Then when we start packing those pounds, we will have no choice but to spend on health products and exercise classes or gym memberships! And at the end of the day, we inflict self-pity and wallow in our sorrows with glass after glass of booze. Hah! It’s all a plot to make us pump all that cash back! What cunning devils you are…

Alright, alright… It’s the bitterness speaking. But you’ve got to admit, it is a very plausible theory.