Troubled or Not?

We walked through the parking lot silently, cautious not to make a sound. There they were, right beside the two telephone booths. No one else was around. It was just us. The empty beer bottles felt cold, clutched in my hands. My palms were cold and sweaty as I gripped the bottles tighter. The first crash of glass against body rang through the empty parking lot.

They screamed. They ran. But we closed in on them. There was nowhere else to run. The telephone booths seemed to be their only shelter. They ran into the 2 booths and shut the doors. That did not stop us. The hard glint in our eyes plain for them to see. They screamed and shouted for help, but we just kept flinging the bottles at them. Blood poured out of their open wounds. The blood mostly ran down from their heads. There was blood on the transparent telephone booth walls. They screamed. I continued to fling the bottles at them. Hoping each time that the impact would be greater; perfecting my aim with each throw. My targets.

The screams ceased, but the echoes continued to ring through the empty parking lot. In the distance, the sound of the crowds floated to us. We looked at our work of art. The few bodies slumped in the booth. Dead weights. Blood. Dead bodies.

The sound of laughter came from a distance. Someone was coming; we had to go. Not saying a word, we turned and walked in the direction of the crowds; where light met the darkness of the car park. My expression revealed nothing of what had just happened. But my heart slammed against my chest. I prayed to God to forgive me this once. I could not believe what I had just done. I asked for forgiveness. I told Him that if he let me escape this time, I would never ever do something like that again.

As we stepped out of the parking lot into the light, and mingled with the crowds, we heard screams. Faint as they were, the sounds were so clear to my ears. However, no one else seemed to notice.

------------------------------------------------------

My dream. I don't know why I dreamt it. I don't know what it means. I wish I could decipher this dream though. Have been drinking more than usual lately. My endurance for alcohol is getting better I suppose; 3 mugs and I am still going strong. Much to my surprise, I was asked the same question by 2 of my drinking companions/friends. Mind you, the question was asked separately, and when there was just one of them and me alone. So this made things seem all the more peculiar. Still, it wasn't a very obscure question. Both of them had just turned to me and said, "Ok. What's wrong?"

Now, to be honest, I have no idea what the hell both of them were talking about. So I simply asked, "Huh? Why do you ask that?" One of them replied that I had been drinking more than usual, and the other just said that she could sense this negative energy emanating from me.

To this, I had no answers whatsoever. If I am being really honest, I don't know what is wrong, coz I don't think there is anything wrong. Well, things have pretty much been going fine. No specific problems at work. No friendship or relationship problems. No family trouble. So I just can't figure out what is wrong. But thinking back to that dream, and those of the nights afterwards -- which were mainly focused on me smoking (those of you who know me, know I don't smoke) -- trying to convince myself that I am the happiest and most carefree person on earth is not exactly an easy task.

I mentioned this to a close friend. Pretty much got a good tongue-lashing from her. Apparently, she's been pissed that I'm "cold" to her when we are on the phone or on msn. Damnation. I didn't know I was being so. I still don't think I was "cold". But gee... I don't want to spend my time thinking too much about this. Don't want to end up fretting over a problem that, perhaps, was never there to begin with. Though I can't help thinking how odd this all is.